hasmik simonyan

2 EPISTLES TO MY DAUGHTER

1.
my bloodless daughter
frolicking in my capillaries all along
stop playing
stop drying up so pompously either
when i water you to grow
close your face with the rain
when i comb your hair
when i make up your eyes and lips
then dandle you to sleep
telling you aaaah
i’m your doll, OK?
i’m your pillow, OK?
i don’t exist — you’re yelling like a black cloud
flooding my house, sticking out your tongue
and walking away despondently
you don’t exist,
girl,
because my heart was generous and naïve
and i kept all the snakes in my bosom
when it was cold
they fed on my body
and when there was nothing left from me
they spat in my empty shadow
licked their lips, content,
and left to find a warm corner
leaning on my dead table
i’m tasting my tears with my tongue — they’re never the same
nor is the amount of the tide
the year is rainy, my daughter
i don’t want hails
so that when i water you, you might grow
i’ll thrust my fingers into the ground, tickle your roots so that you’ll bloom
send me elderly men, my daughter
skilled gardeners who will soften my tough heart in the cracking sun

 

2.
my daughter, i washed my hair, dressed
tinted my nails — your favorite crimson—
now that i am so good-looking,
my daughter,
give me the sway to wait for you
to wait for our daddy
and not to be cheated by these sirmaids
that sing from behind seven mountains and seven seas
about castles with tons of stars, planets of gold
which they will send to our moms
as a love price for giving birth to us
i’m scared, my daughter, so scared
that our ship’s helm might turn its direction
and enchanted with the grandeur of a hollow voice
she might hit the reefs
leaving our daddy an orphan
to say nothing of me
and you — forever unborn

Translated by Ann Voskanian

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